by Brita Johnson

2020 has been…not what we’d hoped for, to put it mildly. As we round the corner into the last months of the year, the COVID case numbers, economic realities, stress of schooling our littles at home, and the isolation most of us are experiencing due to the global pandemic can feel all-encompassing.

These last two months of the year also bring us into the holiday season, during which we may be facing difficult choices about distancing from loved ones and changes to our special family traditions - increasing our stress, sadness and sense of isolation.

Yet, the holiday season also places gratitude front and center, and this month is a great time to start a gratitude practice.

Say what? You might say that seems a little tone-deaf. You might argue that, with the compressed schedules and capacity that many of us parents are living, it feels impossible to justify the time and energy to start something new.

But there’s science behind the value of a gratitude practice. Multiple studies suggest that even simple gratitude practices benefit our mental and physical wellbeing, with impacts including:

1. More resistance to stress

2. Decreased levels of depression

3. Stronger immune systems

4. Lower risk of heart disease and hypertension

5. Better sleep

6. Greater sense of self-efficacy

7. Positive outcomes following trauma and negative life experiences

8. General feelings of wellness/well-being

9. Improvement in interpersonal relationships

It’s great for kids, too. Gratitude improves resilience - and though kids are naturally resilient, this is a year of extra challenges for them, and gratitude can help us support our kids’ ability to thrive and come through tough times courageously. For older kids, research shows that teens who kept gratitude journals were less materialistic, more generous, and made healthier eating choices. And for all of us, kids included, gratitude leads to more gratitude and all the positive health impacts above - giving our kids a start with gratitude when they’re young can offer a lifetime of benefit!

There’s no prescription for a gratitude practice; there are many ways to incorporate gratitude into our daily lives in ways that feel authentic - and most importantly, doable. What’s fun, too, is that it’s an activity we can do together with our children. Here are some of our favorite ideas for ways to incorporate gratitude on the daily - for us and for our kids:

1. Keep a gratitude journal - note 1-3 things each day that you’re grateful for, either on paper or in one of many apps available for the purpose

2. Make a family “gratitude chain”

3. Write thank you letters - and help your kids write some, too - to people you’re grateful for/to

4. Take turns sharing one thing you’re grateful for, when your family sits down together at the dinner table

5. Spend time reminiscing about fun experiences and favorite people

6. Look at pictures of past adventures with your family members - bonus idea: snap some “pics of the pics” with your cell phone and send them to others who were with you on those trips

7. Schedule a Zoom call or socially-distanced porch visit with an old friend, a relative who lives alone, or anyone you’re missing in your life

8. Plan and execute a random act of kindness for someone - it doesn’t have to be sublime, simple will suffice to help you and someone else be grateful for the little things

9. Find a written or recorded guided meditation and work it into your day or week

10. Give yourself grace - not every day is going to feel like a grateful kind of day, so skip to tomorrow if today’s gratitude practice isn’t feeling authentic for you

While a gratitude practice can’t erase injustice, loss, or pain, it can provide an anchor in challenging times, bringing us closer to hope and healing. Wishing you grace, gratitude and wellness this month and every month!